Ten reasons why walking with your children is bad for your health

1. It will inevitably give you heart palpitations as they scoot/run/ sprint/ bike off into the sunset and leave you shouting ‘LOOK DOWN DRIVEWAYS,’ ‘LOOK DOWN DRIVEWAYS,’ ‘LOOK DOWN DRIVEWAYS!!’

2. They will complain every. step. of. the. way.

3. You will end up holding the scooter/ bike/ dirty clothing/ and the child in some bizarre uncomfortable configuration.

4. They will need to go to the toilet.

5. They will shout at you about how cruel you are for taking them walking.

6. You will have a near heart attack with the weight of all the gear you are carrying and the guilt of being a bad person for taking the children walking when you should have just let them watch another movie.

7. You will get tired beyond belief at the half way point and struggle to comprehend how you might return home.

8. You forgot to bring your cell phone because you were trying to be all free and lovely and you will KICK yourself.

9. Your children will glare at you with unfettered hatred in their eyes.

10. What has been walked, cannot be unwalked.

11. Blisters.  See? Walking is such an unwise activity, there is no end to this list…

12. You will get a stick in your eye.ImageImage

 

13. You will discover that the new jandals you just brought will again be two sizes too small and you will make them wear the jandals anyway.ImageImageImage

14. There will be gate fights, and they will be of EPIC proportion.Image

 

You have been warned.

Goodnight.

.m.Image

 

 

 

 

The chickens are restless… And trying to eat my progeny

Good evening. It’s sticky hot here in the heart of Hawkes’ Bay. Like blazing, uncomfortable, can’t sit still as it seems to seep into the bones, but can’t move as the heat seems to follow like a mound of woollen blankets. Incidentally, as I say this, the air does seem to be cooling, but I suspect I’ll still go into the kids room tonight when they are sound asleep, and freak out at the amount of sweat a two year old can produce in her sleep.

On a quest for something a bit different this afternoon, we went to a local park, and got harassed by some chickens. They were seriously all up in our business, like this.

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and this

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Juje was all like GET OUTTA MAH FACE LADY!!  Only in a much more angry type voice. Leo was loving it, in kind of a timid, antsy way.

And then I thought, hey, the kids are tired and have had a long day, why not drag them to get some walnuts. I mean, how idyllic is the thought of gathering walnuts in the late summer sunshine. Unfortunately, the trip involved rather a lot more temper than I had bargained for. I’m not sure why I didn’t bargain for more, it is one of the inevitabilities of my fiery lass. Anyway, as proof of the idyllic nature of the sojourn, see below.

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Look how lovely it appears.

Now look.

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And now closer…

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See that angry pixie in the grass? Ah my baby.

 

And that was today in a walnut shell. 

Idyllic? Maybe in the pictures, with the sound down. 

.m.